DISTORTIONS– What Are Your Thoughts? Part 2

“The world we have created is a product of our thinking; it cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” – Albert Einstein

This is Part 2 of DISTORTIONS – What are your thoughts? If you have not read Part 1 it would be a good idea to read that first. Doing so will help you get the most out of the information given in this months blog. For those of you who have read Part 1 let’s get started.

Last month we looked at 10 common cognitive distortions. Hopefully by now, you have spent some time pondering if any of the distortions applied to you. If they did you might have found it both enlightening as well as unsettling to think that just maybe how you’ve been seeing and interpreting your world could have been flawed at times. BUT, life is a learning process right? So today is the day you can start moving forward in an optimal way. And that’s a GOOD thing!

GETTING STARTED

On paper create a table with 4 columns. Label each column as follows; THOUGHTS, FEELINGS, COGNITIVE DISTORTIONS, CHALLENGE. Begin by writing down any repetitive thought you have. Notice what feelings you are experiencing associated with that thought and write those down. These can include emotions as well as any physical sensations associated with that thought. Then, analyze those thoughts; is there a cognitive distortion there or would you say your thought is rational? If not rational, think of an alternative response to challenge the distortion. NOTE: Sometimes a thought can have more than one cognitive distortion in it.

Using a few of the 10 examples from last months blog I will show you a couple of possibilities on how the columns may be filled in. Your information will of course be individual to you. Over time as you fill in the columns it will be helpful having the information in front of you instead of trying to keep it all in your mind.

IDENTIFY AND CHALLENGE

EXAMPLE: If your performance falls short of perfect, you see yourself as a total failure.

Thought:  “I royally screwed that up, I am such a loser!”

Feeling: depressed, angry, hopeless

Cognitive Distortion: All-or-Nothing Thinking

Challenge: “Even though my speech wasn’t perfect I think I did a pretty good job!”

EXAMPLE: Spilling coffee on your shirt and thinking, “This always happens to me!”

Thought: “Good grief, I can’t even eat or drink anything without spilling on myself!”

Feeling: anger, defeated, stressed, stomach feels like it is in a knot.

Cognitive Distortion: Overgeneralization

Challenge: “Come to think of it, it really doesn’t happen very often.” 

EXAMPLE: Making a simple mistake at work and panic that you will be fired.

Thought: “As soon as my boss finds out she’s going to fire me. I just know it!”

Feeling: anxious, embarrassed, worried, tense shoulders

Cognitive Distortion: Magnification (Catastrophizing) or Minimization

Challenge: “Relax, It’s just a small mistake, no one is even going to notice.”

OR

Thought: “Just because I got an “A” on the text doesn’t mean I’m smart.”

Feeling: low self-esteem

Cognitive Distortion: Magnification (Catastrophizing) or Minimization

Challenge:  “WOW, studying really paid off, I’m so proud of myself!” 

QUESTIONS TO CHALLENGE FAULTY THINKING

  • Is this thought true, or am I turning this thought into a “fact”?
  • Is thinking this way helpful?
  • Do I have evidence to back up this thought?
  • Is there an alternative way I could be thinking about this situation or myself?
  • Am I jumping to conclusions?
  • Am I assuming the worst?
  • Am I blaming myself for something that really isn’t my fault?
  • What would I say to a friend in this situation?
  • Am I making a mountain out of a molehill?
  • Am I questioning my worth as a person because of this one thing that has happened?
  • Was it really in my control?
  • Am I only seeing the negative side of things?
  • What effect is thinking this way having on me?
  • Am I assuming that things will never change?

Because we tend to be so focused on our way of seeing life, sometimes, we just need to pause for a moment and consider the validity of our thoughts. Irrational thoughts tend to be unreasonable, judgmental, and leaning toward the extreme, whereas rational thoughts will be more realistic, compassionate and broad-minded. And because cognitive distortions are usually converted into anger, fear, sadness, frustration, low self-esteem, anxiety, depression, etc., they have the potential to cause serious damage to our sense of self, our confidence, our relationships, and our ability to succeed in life.

By using these exercises to identify cognitive distortions in a methodic way you will become more aware of the link between your thoughts and your feelings and how it affects your behaviors. Once you start to challenge those cognitive distortions you can replace the distorted thinking with a more rational alternative.

If you have any questions on how these exercises work or would like to find other ways to combat distorted, biased and inaccurate thinking, please call me, (Kris Henderson) at 616-516-1570 or schedule an appointment online. Together we will find an effective solution to help you move away from the distortions and closer to a more positive and realistic way of experiencing the world around you.